Thursday, May 26, 2011

Mad Men is Good for My Body Image?!

I love Mad Men.  More specifically, I love Christine Hendricks.  She is the most beautiful women on television.  Her character Joan is sexy and stylish and smart AND she is around a size 10.  No not a size 0 a size ten.  My basic google researching skills have uncovered that although her bra size is a little bigger than mine we are about the same size and have similar measurements.  This is an amazing revelation for me.  

I have never been the petite girl.  At almost 5'9 tall it is impossible to be petite.  Even in high school when I was at my thinnest (20lbs less than I am now) I still had curves.  Like most women I have days that I feel fat or ugly but for a long time I was always confident with my curves.  Unfortunately, my most recent long term relationship did a number on my confidence.  I never felt pretty enough or skinny enough or fit enough with my last partner. 

Now, just over 6 months since we ended our relationship I finally seem to be reclaiming my body and my beauty.  I have gained a little weight but I am trying to embrace my curves this time, not fight them.  Sure, I could work out more, eat less ice cream or train to run a marathon but none of these things would make me happy or make me feel better about who I am.  I am learning to accept myself as I am and only then will I be able to make any lasting changes. 

I by no means think that embracing your body is an excuse to get fat and eat junk food, but I do think the depriving yourself of all the foods that you love and wasting all your free time at the gym is never going to make anybody happy.  I would much rather have a glass of wine on Girls Night then have to spend an hour on the treadmill.  That is who I am, that is what makes me happiest on the inside.  I know that I eat healthy 80% of the time, I am not worried about my health. 

Learning to be the best version of yourself is hard, really hard...but I am giving it a shot.

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